Why did i start making sculptures?
An Emotional Journey
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”
I hold a BA in art from an American University with a minor in education. I was certified to teach art to adults and children of all ages. I have certificates from the School of Visual Arts, Manhattan in graphic design and illustration. I also have teaching certificates for New York and California, where I taught art to 12–18-year-old girls, while working towards my Master’s degree in the evening.
During these early years I began developing my own fine art practice, exhibiting my paintings in a few galleries and outside art shows. However, all this was forgotten when I moved to the UK; when I became a wife and mother. I had no friends, no tribe of artists or creatives, no verification of who I was. That part of me faded and I felt like I had become invisible. How do we validate who we are?
I started making fabric sculptures because I lost myself momentarily; all my professional training and my life before moving to the UK was temporarily forgotten.
For the first 9 years of living in the UK I made no art at all. I made cushion covers, curtains, throws, blankets; I changed the colours on the walls in my house, learned upholstery and did gardening; I created art and craft projects with my children, made costumes, painted scenery and volunteered to help with school art projects, and the list goes on... What I never once did was sketch, draw, or paint on canvas for my own pleasure. My sewing machine and limited sewing skills were my only creative outlet.
And then I made a friend…
I met her while filling in the blanks of my life trying to connect to some sanity walking around the lanes in Brighton with a crying baby. She came from a design background and had an idea to make unusual cushions. We brainstormed and came up with some crazy titles and designs. I started to feel my life had a sense of purpose again - being a domestic goddess was not a role I had imagined for myself and was not proving to be enough to be fulfilling. Our designs and material choices were completely different from each other, which was great as we sparked each other creatively. Other friends of mine owned a coffee shop and roasted their own coffee. I collected all their hessian coffee sacks and washed and left them hanging in the rain for weeks as the rain seemed to be relentless. As a consequence, I discovered that rainwater is a natural softener. My washing machine got a bit mucked up from the hessian, but I didn’t care – I was being creative; my creative juices were reawakened. I made many hessian cushions some painted, trapunto quilted, tasselled…
During this time, I stumbled upon an art exhibition in a vacant shop in a local Shopping Mall. I was so delighted and excited to see good quality art that I could relate to. I started chatting to the invigilating artists and joined their artist’s group. It was very exciting!!!!
Belonging to a group brought more creative possibilities. There were open studio events, meeting other artists, opportunities to exhibit. I didn’t rent any space in the studio, but I had all the perks of being part of an artistic community, while I could work from home. It was these group opportunities that pushed me onto another level. My hessian cushions eventually became hangings that had added driftwood and beads. The pieces I was designing were getting bigger and denser with the added embellishments. While exhibiting in a public space, I was advised to protect my work behind glass primarily for safety reasons. However, the denser the surface of the work, the more expensive the framing. I continued like this for several years, getting frustrated with the cost of framing and becoming bored with churning out work which I felt was becoming stagnant.
I had a moment of clarity when a solution to an ongoing problem was suddenly solved. I realized I could make my thickly textured hangings into free standing sculptures. I just had to figure out how to do it. I made my first sculpture after being inspired by the African Exhibition at the Royal Academy, with many other sculptures following quickly after.
I began really enjoying myself and I started feeling like a valued artist again. Slowly my self-esteem started to grow. I remembered who I was before re-locating to the UK; before being a wife and mother; It all came flooding back. I had experience as a practicing artist, I was a creative person that needed to create in order to feel happy and fulfilled.
The void I had felt for many years was finally starting to fill up…
